poetry

‘Welsh’ Poet Laureate

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I know, it’s the biggest joke in literature and not really worthy of anyone’s attention but I thought it might be a laugh to post a few of this guy’s poems here, so we could all make up our mind just how good, bad or ugly the country’s latest public face of the Taffia is…

Ah, then I encountered a slight problem. The TV presenter someone chose is not only completely unheard of, has only produced a handful of Welsh language poetry books but doesn’t actually produce anything in English. Mmm? Strange then that the language of 80% of the population should be neglected in favour of this ‘bard’. So much for democracy and appealing to the masses. Who actually voted for this bloke? Who choose him? Was it a public vote I wonder? I’d have chosen Rhod Gilbert myself.

Anyway, I shouldn’t be too negative, I’m sure he’ll come out with some absolute gems, just like the last couple we’ve had… can’t remember any, but there you go.

Oh wait, stop press, I did find something this guy has done in English. The Toilet: An Unspoken History (2012), a TV programme which sort of sums up the current Welsh literature scene.

Current National Poet of Wales, Gillian Clarke said “Ifor ap Glyn is a friend.” Never!

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Tough Times

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Did you hear about the poor old writers who are now quaking in their Hunters on their farms bought by us the taxpayer? Well, it seems that the times of cash for crap – or to put it another way, money for nothing could soon be over.

Thanks to the cuts at Cardiff council they now can’t afford to give money away to an arts establishment that already gets millions from the taxpayer in order to help finance the Cardiff Poetry competition. Not that it was much of a competition in the first place, with nearly all winners being ex-students of the various universities anyway, and very few of the winning poems being any good.

But one must ask why Literature Wales still can’t run a poetry competition? How many people does it take for God’s sake! One useless bimbo to open the envelopes, one to bank the cheques and one to divide the poems up into two piles – ‘my friends’ and the rest. Then pay a judge no-one has ever heard of to pick a pile of rubbish as winners from the ‘my friends’ list. Easy.

Worst Poem Ever?

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Hi peeps,

I noticed that our so-called ‘poet laureate’ – Gillian Clarke has produced a poem to mark the death of former South African leader Nelson Mandela this week.  I read the poem and thought ‘what a load of shit’.  No real feeling, no heartfelt emotion, no political comment, not even a dig at child murderer Winnie!  Very boring.

So your challenge this month is to find a worse poem written by a Welsh Academi (Literature Wales) sponsored ‘writer’.  Come on, don’t be shy, there must be thousands of them out there lurking, unread in the storerooms of the LW office or gathering dust on shelves in various attractions up and down the land.

If you can think of any please post the name of the poem and poet – might be a laugh!